Challenge your Trust

Image by duremi

“We’re never so vulnerable than when we trust someone – but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy”- Walter Anderson

Trust is a funny thing because it seems like it’s external to us – that trustworthiness is inherent in the opposing party – but it actually starts within each of us as a mental perspective.  In order to trust others, we need to trust ourselves first.  When we trust others, it tends to bring more trust back to us.  It’s a wonderful feedback loop.  However, the opposite is also true.  If you don’t trust yourself, then your trust for those around you lacks.  Everyone within the frame work of this environment feels it and trust crumbles all around.  I’m going to guess that you’ve experienced both situations.

In my own life, though I have trouble with it at times, I continually push to trust myself even in the most difficult situations.  Whenever I encounter a situation that is a slight bit uneasy my mind immediately begins crafting all of the possible scenarios of what could happen.  As I begin to get uneasy with the thoughts and possible scenarios streaming from my mind I usually snap to attention and catch myself.  I breathe deeply and try to release the imagined scenarios.  To replace them I think of all the sketchy or difficult situations I’ve encountered in my life and how I’ve always managed to get through them.  I remind myself to trust in what I can do and to be still mentally.

The lack of trust that is created and felt between other people often stems from our original lack of trust in being able to handle ourselves. I would also extend this to trust on the group level – like not trusting the government or corporations.  Lack of trust in yourself leads to being fearful of a situation and full trust leads to being confident in the same situation- confident that you’ll figure out whatever you need to when the time comes.  I have no doubt that the ability to trust and distrust is hard-wired in our minds to keep us safe from predators.  But in today’s workplace or most social situations it isn’t necessary and can often lead us off on a wild mental ride.

The bigger question and the challenge is: can we encounter our fears, and trust anyway? Trust leaves you open and vulnerable which can be scary at first but it also opens you up to a world of possible amazing experiences.  If that’s not enough to convince you just consider the opposite, that lack of trust leaves you closed off and defensive against the world.  Next time you feel yourself closing up due to lack of trust, assume instead that the others are there to help you and serve you in some way.  Challenge your trust and open yourself up to the moment.